Wednesday, June 14, 2006

ABC, You May Have Just Cost Me A Security Deposit

The folks in charge of scheduling at ABC, in their infinite wisdom, have decided to schedule the OSU-Michigan game at 3:30 (HT: Buckeye Commentary). For some reason (involving dollar signs, I imagine), the schools have decided to go along with this.

I think this is a bad idea. Some who agree with me do so because of tradition. The Game is meant to be played at noon, the argument goes. That's the way it's always been, that's the way it should be.

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Wrong "The Game"

I don't make this argument. For starters, last year it was moved to 1:00, already breaking tradition. Further, I'd argue that traditions should be followed only if there's not a good reason to get rid of them. I'd argue that a three hour change in start time is worth it if it brings in a bunch of extra cash, which is it likely to do.

No, I argue against the move out of concern for my automobile. As you are aware, in 2002 Ohio State beat Michigan in a noon game, securing a spot in the national title game, and there was rioting. This year, we come in among the preseason favorites for the championship, so a repeat of that situation is not out of the question (furiously knocking on wood). Except that this time, ABC has decided to grant an extra three hours of drinking to potential rioters. I doubt the University and Columbus Police Department's well thought-out and effective (ahem) plan of ticketing people possessing open containers of alcohol will be enough to offset this additional drinking time. The end result?

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Not entirely accurate; a significant orc presence is unlikely.

Of course, there is the possibility that students, citizens of Columbus, and the assorted multitude of thousands just in town for the game will have learned that it is possible to celebrate a big victory peacefully. Not likely, but not impossible.

I suppose, though, that if people are going to set things on fire, they're going to do it regardless of the kickoff time. A later start isn't going to help things, but it's probably not creating problems. And who's to say I wouldn't set my car on fire in exchange for a National Championship? I'm not sure I would, but I'd at least consider it.

Of course, there's the very real possibility that the Buckeyes will get to the Michigan game with a loss or more, and none of this will be an issue. So why worry about it before it happens? We'll burn that bridge when we come to it.

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